September 14, 2010

ALIVE!

Friends, I am alive!  Getting the kids, and myself into the new routine has taken some adjustment.  I will be back and posting soon, hopefully tomorrow.  If I had time to Post It Note today, as it is Tuesday, it would read....Is a day off really a day off?  Seems like I am just as busy, if not more.

September 07, 2010

Post It Note Tuesday-Hoping It Sticks

That One Mom















Post It Note Tuesday got a new home...click on "That one Mom" post it to check it out and join in!




September 06, 2010

The Stew Room

Here I sit in my office, i.e, my bedroom; lying in my comfy bed, nervous, scared, anxious.  Tomorrow is the first day of school.  Drama queen heads off to Kindergarten, and the boy to Autism Day Treatment.  I will actually have two hours to myself tomorrow.  The list I've written will not be accomplished in that time, this much I know.  Thought I'd share my list, (no, I didn't copy yours, this is an original baby)....
  1. Laundry
  2. Cleaning
  3. Paperwork (blah, always paperwork)
  4. Work
  5. Clean out the car
  6. Post Office
  7. Grocery Store
  8. Time for me...relax?
I know what the priority needs to be.  I am running on empty here as of late, making it on caffeine, a quick bite here and there, and adrenaline from running here to there.  I don't want school to start, because I know then for sure, there will be no time to slow down.  It seems as if the summer passed in the blink of an eye, and my October calendar is already filling up.  I so badly want to just slam on the breaks and pull over.  (I now envision a beautiful "Little House on the Prairie-esq" field full of wild flowers up to my knees and me running through them in slow motion-skinny...and with long shiny hair...well manicured...and NO ponytail) It's my fantasy, why not. Note: There are no men there.  I have always snuck in the me time, but I am feeling that I need a re-charge and I am looking for balance.  I could just say to heck with it and take a nap for the two hours, but then I will have to scramble to make up for the list cited above, and the rest of this week doesn't look like it's giving me an inch!

I am so lucky to have connected with a wonderful group of single mom bloggers, and well wonderful bloggers all around.  So I ask you Moms, how do you find your me time?  The co-parenting (slim co-parenting) time the kids spend with BD allows me to work without paying even more childcare costs than I do already.  My days are filled with constant errands and appointments, a full time job, and my 50 mile round trip to therapy 4 times a week, now increases to 5 with Day Treatment. 

My soul is in need of some restoration.  I need to be filled again with all of that goodness and simplicity in life that makes it so wonderful.  So help me out Mommy's...and don't say take a bath.  Nearly impossible.  That would just be a tease.  Not two minutes into it and my kids would start WWII, then I would just be dripping wet; or if I wait until they go to sleep, I may drift off and drown, then my children would be Mommy-less.  There I go relaxing again....

I really want to know...how many Mom's out there really, and I mean really, deliberately carve out some time in their day/week/hour for some me time?  What do you do?  HOW do you accomplish this?

September 04, 2010

Saturday Nine: Half the (Wo-)Man I Used To Be



1. Do you feel that you are essentially the same person that your were ten years ago?  NO WAY!!!  I'd like to know who is, but I am not even the same one bit.  I still have friends from 20 years ago, so in some ways I must still be the same.  We all change and grow by experiences, I believe that makes you who you are.  Every milestone in life changes you, your values and what you value increases.  High School changes you, college changes you, living on your own changes you, dating changes you, marriage, children, grandchildren, so on and so on.  For example, you may not value friendship until you hit rock bottom and really need a friend and someone is there for you even though you may not have been there for them. 


2. Is there something that you have to give all or nothing to?  I wouldn't say nothing.  I pretty much give my all in every aspect of my life, or I have been known to do things mediocre.  So many things I wish I could give my all to, my kids, to God; but that will come when my world stops spinning just a tinge.  I give nothing to drama.  I'm out.  Don't want it, don't want to hear it, don't even want to be within a 5 mile radius of it.  Unless by court order via divorce decree.

3. Have you ever gambled? What have you bet on and for how much?   Only slots.  Never saw the big deal with gambling, and I don't really bet one anything.

4. Can you sleep anywhere or does it have to be in a bed? BED!!  I am a snob.  I CAN sleep on a plane.  But not in a car, on a train, in a boat, with a goat, I will not, will not Sam I AM.  I'm an inside kind of girl, no camping for me either.

5. Tell us about the most disastrous or embarrassing first impression you've ever made on someone.  Well it's like a full blown I told ya so right in the face.  With my ex, our first date I was totally hammered, ie. drunk.  I had just had an way too long happy hour with my girlfriends, came home to "rest", and fell asleep as he rang the doorbell for 10 minutes.  Not my finest moment.  But that might say a lot, hummm.

6. Do you have a memorable "ripped clothing" moment in your life? No? How about in someone else's? In 5th grade I was on the "safety patrol".  I was in charge of drop off duty, I had to go open the car door for kids and escort them to the door of the school safely.  One morning, halfway through shift, a downpour began.  I had an umbrella and carried on.  When I got to class I was soaked, and mind you all the other patrolers bailed.  All the kids in my class totally laughed at me.  I will never forget how embarrassed I was.  I had done something I was proud of and thought was admirable and I was made to feel like an idiot. Kids can be so rough.  Even my teacher (a gem she was by the way, worst teacher ever, and fired after that year) also joined in the fun.  That brought my self-esteem down a few notches to say the least.

7. What's changed on your blog since its inception? ...a redo? ...a change of pace? ...or is it about the same? I have had a bit of a makeover, and one day I will get a full blown blogover, when I can afford it.  Other than adding a few Memes, I think same ol' me, same time, same place.

8. If you could travel back in time and whisper something to yourself ten years ago, what would it be? Trust your instincts, they are always right.

9. Okay, let's have it! What's the craziest, most impulsive thing you've ever done?  Not telling, I feel like I've already been to therapy this Saturday 9 as it is:)

Happy Saturday all, have a safe holiday weekend.

September 01, 2010

Sniffling

Hello everyone.  Sorry I split there for awhile, I had a crazy work weekend into week and I am constantly on the phone and scrambling to arrange every detail of BOTH the kids starting school in 6 days.  (Shameless blubbering)  The drama queen will be off to kindergarten and daycare and the boy will be off to Autism Day Treatment, M-F.  This is a hard transition for a once SAHM, well and I suppose for any Mom for that matter.  It's not that I'm sad, I know it will be great for both of them, I am saddened at how quickly the time passed.  Don't you just hear that all the time when you have your little one, "cherish the time now, they grow up in a blink of an eye", you know....I just politely smiled and nodded and agreed and just thought, whatever.  Well, I just said it the other day...yes...I....did.  *sigh*  I have now become that which I rolled eyes at...like my mother.

I am pretty sure I can handle the first day of school with heavy medication, a drink and chocolate, but what I am dreading the most is to happen tomorrow.  Our last day with our Occupational Therapist and Speech Therapist for the last year plus.  They love Gabe sooo much, and all the progress he has made would not even be possible if not for their endless hours of love and dedication for my son; for my family.  Really, through all our ups and downs the last year, with the exception of me, they have been Gabe's constant.  The therapist are throwing him a party tomorrow, and we will collectively sob tears of joy.  I thought I would be able to swing still seeing them once a week along with ADT, but alas insurance/billing, is pulling us apart.  I am also confident we will be back at that practice again some day.  Gabe has many years of therapy ahead of him, and if he keeps on this fabulous road he is, I am also certain he will only be in ADT for a year.

Of course, I had to buy them a gift.  But seriously what do you buy someone who has changed your life?  I have been struggling with this one for weeks.  I finally decided on a boo-hoo card from the heart and since they just opened a new practice and are in need of equipment went to the toy store and went Melissa and Doug bananas!  Lots of games and puppets and sensory items donated by the boy so other little kiddles can grow and learn and find their way too.  Any thoughts, is this okay?

I will always be so grateful for them.  I call them the miracle workers, what they do is beyond comprehension, they pull out of my son what I cannot.  They teach me and my son what we need to survive, thrive, and grow in the little (but increasing rapidly) Autism Universe.