May 13, 2011

Click.Sputter.Blah.

{Well, I'm going to re-publish this post since Blogger took a nose dive and erased it along with the comments, I think I responded to all of you before the crash.  Luckily this was saved as a draft, good thing, or not.}


That title there, Click. Sputter. Blah, that would be my brain I'm referring to. It is not firing properly {hasn't for some time}. I think they {not sure who they are, I hope they're nice}should do a scientific study on my brain to find out why in the world I can retain the most useless information known to man, but cannot remember important things. I'm doubtful any scientists read this blog, so I'm counting on you to get the word out, thanks. No offense to anyone, you are all brilliant, no seriously brilliant, I've seen your work. I'll site a few examples for you....



Why can I remember your nieces' best friend's 1st grade report card stats from 1987, but not that it is walk home from school day the 3rd Friday of every month just as it has been all.year.long.?

Why can I remember the Emperor Penguin can be up to 48 inches tall, live to be 50 years old and stay under water for 18 minutes without taking a breath; but not that I have to leave 10 minutes earlier to get gas before my morning commute? {And I forgot to return the DVDs again}

Why can I remember how many ounces of glue, inches of wire, square feet of paper and approximate metric weight of beads I need to purchase for my next Mom's craft night, but have to read the box of Mac N Cheese every time I make it to remember the required measurement of butter needed?

How can I hook up a computer, assemble a double stroller instruction-less {was not sad to see that beast go}, but cannot for the life of me remember the right way to assemble the darn hot wheels track properly {I hate those things-same goes for train tracks}.

I can also convert yards, inches and meters quick as a whip, but have little to no aptitude for math. I can't explain how that works, the inner workings of my brain are complex. After my kids learn how to count by 10s, I am sure I will no longer be able to help with homework. I still do long division...{who am I kidding, I use a calculator}apparently they do not teach long division in school anymore. This does not bode well for my kids, and my Autistic son shows no savant brilliance in the math department, nor can he tell you how many toothpicks dropped on the floor by sight. The boy calls his index finger his "number one", as in "Mommy, I hurt my number one", sorry kid. Perhaps I should be going to the PTA meetings to get to the bottom of all this, but I have successfully avoided them all year long, and don't plan to make my presence known anytime soon because they will descend on me like vultures and I can't say no {they can smell it, the inability to say no, not me, however that might be smart tactical defense.}. Plus I forgot the meeting was tonight, again. I am already the sole "room-parent", isn't this enough? Those kids are darn lucky Drama Queen reminds me of said party with a daily countdown every 10-15 minutes of my life. {Okay that's a mild exaggeration, every half hour} But God bless those PTA volunteers, it's a lot of work.

Why can I remember the cookie recipe perfectly from 4 different packages of chocolate chips and the varying degrees of ingredients, but again forget to send lunch money with my daughter only then to receive the lunch lady version of a collection bill and a big red stamp on her hand in semi-permanent ink that won't rub off for 3-5 days. She frightens me, the lunch lady, maybe I'll send cookies.

Perhaps I never fully recovered from "pregnancy brain"? Is it still in shock? Overloaded? Full? {I'm laughing at that one too}

Luckily I have a planner, which I record all important appointments and would be quite handy if I ever remembered to check it. And what a saving grace the calendar on my Crackberry is, if I could ever find it too because it has run away with my car keys to the infamous "black hole".

Some days I feel like I need Alzheimer’s early intervention, or at least some medication right? Good thing I read and exercise to keep my mind sharp! Then I'd never forget the garbage comes on Wednesday, or that it actually is Wednesday and not Tuesday like it thought it was until 1pm today. This concludes my post. Send help. {And a tutor}

8 comments:

  1. your brain sounds similar to mine. and tracks are a bitch to put together AND take apart. some days i just want to glue them together onto a board so i don't have to deal with them anymore.... i think we both have too much on our minds and can't keep up. that's my excuse, anyways.... =)

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  2. Oh my gosh!! I have to read the box EVERY time for the amount of milk and butter... I make it at least twice a week! Love this - it makes me feel normal.

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  3. When the kids were younger I had child induced ADD. If they called me for something and I was washing dishes I wouldn't return to the dishes I would start doing something else. Then I would walk into the kitchen and wonder how I forgot to finish the dishes. The water was cold the clean dishes were waiting to be rinsed. Or if it was laundry. I'd wonder where my clothes were and remember, "Oh ya, they're in the dryer still." I can't believe my kids were ever so little that when they needed me it couldn't wait until I was finished with what I was doing!

    The brains of us moms. What they go through!

    I like your brain it makes me laugh!

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  4. Hmmm, might have actually been helpful if I had re-edited this before I re-posted it. Doh! If this was going to happen, happened with the perfect post. This has been a long week....I need a drink.

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  5. Can you share your drink with me? I've been actually kinda stressing about my lack of brain cells recently. It seems that I, too, have never recovered from pregnancy brain. I had no idea it was a permanent condition. I guess I'm super cool that way. You, too! Right? LOL. I imagine it only getting worse during the summer when we have no organized activities every day for the kids. Something to look forward to!

    -Angela (aka Caffeinated Autism Mom)
    http://caffeinatedautismmom.blogspot.com

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  6. Yes you can! Summer should be okay, my brain functions better in the outdoors, and the kids aren't literally climbing the walls. This is apparently totally normal according to the other comments left by peeps that validated the post...that were erased by Blogger. I too scoured the internet for some sort of research to back me, but no such luck. Considering the timeliness of the Blogger Breakdown, I'm thinking conspiracy theory. I did find an interesting study about Autism Mom's of adolescents having similiar stress levels as combat soldiers, duh. I want to read through all the comments though, but here it is if you're interested, blog on it if you want to also, I will probably never get around to it.
    http://www.disabilityscoop.com/2009/11/10/autism-moms-stress/6121/

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