May 18, 2011

Gimme!!

This post may be referred to as a "rant". Had a few of late. Trust me, it's warranted.  I had another unfortunate run-in with no other than Mr. Inappropriate. No, not the same Mr. I. that made me want to move to Tibet, because I may have dove into the nearest intersection, but obviously a blood relative. At my place of business no less! If I weren't the employee of the month, I swear. When approached by Mr. Inappropriate at place of business I advise using the "robotic defense mechanism". Meaning, shutting down all facial expressions and communication, except for "yes or no", and strategically moving away, far, far away. Don't engage in combative commentary, this only feeds Mr. I. and makes him more powerful and inappropriate. I have a "death glare", but I think it backfires and Mr. Inappropriate finds it irresistible. {What can I tell you, I am what I am, obviously not humble} Oh yes, and turn on your "help me" eyes to co-workers. This is a case for being nice to your co-workers, they could help you, or, turn and laugh. Your choice, so be nice.


So in the manual of men, yeah I know there is no manual. Wait…is there a manual? Perhaps it’s some kind of fraternity swearing in or prank, maybe I’m just being punked. I don’t know, but with comments and emails validating that Mr. Inappropriate and his cult of followers are stalking in exceeding numbers, what gives? I know there are other breeds out there, like my friend Adventures of a Non-Bloggers, narcissistic sociopath, luckily he and I have not met.


I need some answers, I have a son, and I’ll be darned if he is going to act like that. So, maybe it was the way Mr. I and his cronies were raised, you know in a barn, or maybe he was/wasn’t breastfed as a baby. Why do guys like Mr. I.  think its okay to act like that? “That” meaning that women are desperate for them, and it doesn’t matter how much crassness or disrespect they dish out, she wants him. A little bit of me thinks it's because some other girl/or mother has allowed the behavior and condoned it. Thinking this, I then uttered the familiar, "I swear if my son acts like that, so help me.... {trailing off muttering threats and physical violence}". I have every intention of raising a gentleman. But this could go one of three ways, because we know what happens with intentions, and overbearing parents.


1. He’s perfect {apple and tree and such}. Chivalry is not dead and he always uses his manners, has loads of commonsense, is also very sensitive, but not wimpy, for lack of a better word. {I kind of dig a manly man, I think most girls do, but there can be a grayish area between manly and burly Neanderthal, not to be confused please}.


2. Something goes awry and I raise the 40 year old virgin who lives in my basement. {playing video games}

 
3. He thinks he hung the moon, and IS Mr. Inappropriate. Kill me now.


I have no idea how to parent a boy. Scratch that. I know how to parent, but maybe not to raise one. I was raised with all sisters; my Dad traveled every week, no boy cousins around, so I have no foundation. The estrogen at the family reunion is unbelievable I assure you. I’m going to have to punt, or buy a book or something.


Maybe society is to blame for the usual suspect factor? You can always blame society. I hate when I hear, “oh it’s a boy thing”. Pet Peeve! Do boys and girls have different preferences? Yes. However, it does not excuse bad behavior!


Maybe it’s just the male ego? Mr. I. has one too many scoops of this. Maybe boys are shaken not stirred? But please don't shake your baby that could have serious repercussions. {This is a PSA brought to you by Bubble Gum on My Shoe, cuz, well I care, and I don't like baby shaking.}


How about Hormones? Perhaps it has something to do with the Testosterone level? As a woman who has given birth to two children, I have NEVER been on such a roller coaster ride as coming down from the leveling out of hormone birth aftermath. That couple of weeks is scary! {Maybe I’m still reeling?} So I get it, hormone surges, teenage hormones, PMS, got it, it can make you do things you might not normally do. But we're talking a permanent condition with Mr. I. here.  Maybe some kind of glandular dysfunction?  Someone look into that okay.


This drives me crazy, am I a Mr. Inappropriate magnet, or are they increasing in numbers exponentially?  For the record, I don't care for either.  Could science figure this one out please, because I could use some answers. And some sort of repellent or deflector shield.

If science and all else fails me, I'll be blogging from Tibet.

I'll start small

4 comments:

  1. you are awesome and I love your rants! Rant away!

    Btw it's very true about trying to not create another Mr. Inappropriate. But let's be honest if my son is in any way like any of them I'll nag it out of him. Or a good thwack to the back of the head ot knock some sense in might work too (i'm kidding... no thwacking)

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  2. Sadly, Mr. Inappropriates are as common as bugs nowadays. I think much of it is learned from TV and other media sources.

    I have no advice for your problem other than perhaps you should take up kick boxing.

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  3. The Mr. I's are definitely taking over! I have never understood how they think talking to a woman like an idiot or a dog is going to get them somewhere. I generally come back with the "does this behavior ever actually work" attitude, but then am left thinking that it must have worked on somebody somewhere, which makes me sad. Rant away momma, I love it! Your rants are always funny and so very true!

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  4. Oh man... poor Mr. I... somewhere along the line someone praised and rewarded him for his awful behavior... or never showed him the proper way to behave. That is where you will differ... no worries. Just carry pepper spray.

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