A New Diet

Not talking about weight loss or what you eat. Rather a diet for your soul. In one of my posts last week, This Is Where the Magic Happens, where I basically ramble about blogging and why I do it, I said, "Feeds my soul, saves a tree". That got me to thinking, what does feed my soul?


To keep our bodies physically healthy, we eat right, we exercise, we get enough rest...wait, do we? However, do you nurture your soul, your mind? Maybe it's as simple as taking time for yourself. What is this time for self of which I speak?  Putting you first, before husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, kids, family, friends; you! It's taken me many years to figure out what nourishes me from the inside out, besides Jack Daniels and triple chocolate mochacino latte espressos and a spot of medication for good measure. If you can figure this out in your twenties, my highest regards my friend, your wiser {and more sober} than I. In all seriousness, I want to share what grounds me, and makes me feel at peace. I believe that happiness is contentment, not compromise, not complacency, contentment.


Merriam and Webster put it this way, {sucker for a dictionary}, the quality or state of being.


A little list for your reading pleasure:


1. Me ol' blog here. It's my therapist that doesn't require co-pay or ask me how I feel about this, that and the other. It also doesn't want to talk about my childhood and hash up all the denial lovely memories of childhood teenage rebellion.


2. Meditation. I've hit my stride here. I've tried so hard, to do this for so long, when I stopped trying so hard, it just happened naturally. Mediation is not just for Buddhists, Monks, and Oprah; Jesus meditated too. Sometimes this is a hard one for Christians to grasp, seems very taboo. But I love Jesus, and mediation has brought me closer to him. When I can quite my mind, and be aware, I can hear him more clearly.


3. Negativity. Don't do it. Don't partake in it. Just walk away. Blech. This is harder than mediation!


4. Let go and live. Whatever is going to come your way is coming no matter what. Now obviously there is some choice involved here, no bank robbing or anything. Let go of the control, because it doesn't matter. We can most certainly make things happen in our lives, doesn't mean we should just be lazy, but take it in, think about it, release it, otherwise my friend you are going to be a stressed out basket case.


That is my diet, and guess what calorie free! I have a damn skinny soul, she's hot!


What do you do to feed your soul? Doesn't have to be earth shattering, I'm interested.

Use Your Words

I was inspired to write this post by Adriel over at The Mommyhood Memos. She wrote an excellent four part series on Toddler Tantrums, to read clicky. Even though my kids are older-ish, 6 & 4, they still have tantrums. I still have tantrums for goodness sake. So take a read, and you'll know how to deal with me! So Adriel thoroughly covered what you need to know, in the heat of the tantrum, the aftermath, etc., good info. After reading the series, I just thought I'd expound on the subject a bit. While we are waiting out these tantrums, patiently...in public...under watchful judgmental eyes shouldn't we be cheering each other on, encouraging each other? Takes a village right? Often we {please note when I say “we” I mean “I”, just makes me feel better okay} don't enforce patient, gentle parenting, but take the easy road, the lesser teaching road, to make it easier on everyone else around us. But making it easy on the complete stranger rolling their eyes at me doesn’t help my child. It just reinforces the behavior, and you get a kid who throws a whopper every time they don't get a cookie at the grocery store {I know nothing about this}. So I wanted to share two stories about giving public encouragement to parents when they are in knee deep, because Lord knows we get enough discouragement. I'll be your cheering section, because someone was mine once, and I needed that more than I knew I needed it, and I'll never forget it.


My Story:


In the grocery store, nine people deep in the checkout line, the boy decided he'd had enough. He was maxed out, sensory overload. Now I either stick it out {did I mention, this was a grocery run of necessity, procrastinated a week, we needed food} or I leave. Apparently everyone else procrastinated too, and looked as if they were shopping for the apocalypse, I couldn’t do this again. Okay, I'll stick it out. Being calm, keeping cool. Dodging daggers people are throwing my way, ignoring ignorant comments...this will all be over soon, silent prayers kick in. Just then...well roughly when I reached counting to 29 upwards to 100...a woman walked by, gently patted my shoulder and said, "Hang in there Mom". Best feeling ever! Well not ever, but in that moment. I felt recharged, cry on son....I'm hanging in there. That is a great moment that has shaped the way I look at other parents parenting their children.


So here's my pay it forward moment.


Having coffee at the mall one morning before stores open, ALONE! What, when, where, I know right! And the angels descended....and well it was over before I knew it. I saw a beautiful parenting moment take place. The scene is Dad, stroller, and two boys; I'd say 2 and 4. Four year old was meandering around, being quite good, 2 year old on the other hand; tantrum city. Full on screaming about to hit the floor flailing tantrum. Dad was mid storm here. The apparent conflict had arisen when toddler decided he did not want to ride in the stroller, but also did not want to hold Dad's hand if he walked. These were his two choices. No negotiation {nice} no bribery {huh?}. Might I also interject that having it to do all over again, my children would have never touched the grocery store floor and still be riding in the cart at 6 and 4 {sigh}. Dad had squatted down eye level with toddler, calmly restating his choices; walk with hands or ride. And he waited...and waited, every now and then restating the choices for the record. There was no "hurry up", "come on", "no time for this", or just strapping toddler down into the stroller and moving on. {Who would do such a thing...ahem} Just then 4 year old chimed in, after waiting so patiently, he was growing restless, and said something about going to the toy store. Here was Dad's reply, "Just a few more minutes son, your brother is working something out". True to his word, less than 5 minutes passed and toddler stopped crying, grabbed Dad's hand and they were on their way. Bravo! I quickly walked up to Dad, and told him I'd seen the whole meltdown and congratulated him on how skillfully he handled the situation.  He seemed surprised by my comment, but grateful.  We chatted for a moment about how nice it is to have a parent notice the good moments instead of the bad.  Hmmmm, kind of like what we do with our kids too, scold the bad, forget often to praise the good.

I always find when I can parent patiently and kindly {this does get harder as the fatigue factor and frustration level increase} will always yield better results. Sometimes we get so caught up in OUR to do lists, that we forget the most important job on our list is raising these beautiful kids to be thoughtful human beings. Look, I am no perfect parent {surprised? How kind of you, stop laughing}. Who is? Well mall Dad maybe.  I have my moments where I don't want to take the time, or have the energy to help them work it out. I have my bedraggled moments when I'm clenching my teeth and coffee cup just to stay afloat. But I want to teach my kids that life is not a power struggle, rather, it is full of choices. And parenting is not about who's bigger.

My thanks to those two parents for giving me a gentle reminder that I carry with me always.


Do you have a parenting moment when you received encouragement from a stranger?

Where the Magic Happens...

I've been doing some cyber spring cleaning on the ol' blog here. {The boy and I both contracted pinkeye}I accidentally deleted my old layout inadvertently; I'm technologically challenged to some degree. I'm sure my 6 year old will be proofing and publishing my posts in no time. But, in my defense, blogger and I have a love/hate relationship. I love to hate it. It's like a bad, bad puppy you can't train to do what you want. So my cyber spring cleaning list included getting my email inbox from 343 down to 15! Holla! {Why I write like that I don't know, I'm wearing a sweater set for goodness sake} I trimmed down the Google reader; I was following a lot of blogs. So friends if you haven't posted in the last 6 months-buh bye. Sad. Comeback. I myself admit the up keep of a blog can be daunting. Let's face it; about 90% of what I write is complete crap. But I love it, feeds my soul; saves a tree. Not changing the world here just putting my garbage on the corner, you want to sift through it, great; I'll bring you a glass of lemonade. I have definitely had my hiatus moments; moving, divorce, computer burnout, and a blog stalking ex-husband {more than likely because he's still madly in love with me and hanging on...my...every...word, creepy}. As I was tweaking my list I went to revisit some of my favorite blogs I haven't heard from in awhile, or because I missed nearly 100 posts during some sort of crisis or another. Turns out quite a few of them have moved to Word Press. Ooolaalaa, shiny. I have noticed this year some blogs I follow have grown outrageously huge. Wow! That takes effort, congratulations. Sadly, I've also noticed that some peeps have cracked under the pressure. That would be too much for me, there are a lot of negative Nellie’s out there. I think by now I have a few more than family following, and I am a single mom, so I'm not paying anyone off {wink}. I'm sure Google has misled the multitudes a time or two when searching "how to remove gum from shoe". Perhaps I should consider providing that tip in my header, don't want any haters {again, did I mention pearls too}. For my life I have huge aspirations, for my blog, not so much...it's my place for storytelling, tattling, venting, uh, rambling incoherently. Let's just say it's my new husband, but without the snarky comments. Perfect, I'll take it! Whatever you run away pull away from my blog whether it is inspiration, laughter, entertainment, advice, curiosity, relevancy, or where I might be at any given moment for stalking purposes, thank you for reading. Remember kids, if anything, I am here to make you feel normal.


Cari

Riddle Me This....

Scene: Empty Girl Scout cookie box hidden behind the trash can. On the floor was shriveled cellophane wrapping strewn about. Cookie crumbs {thin mint at that} leading to My Little Pony littered floor. I’m pretty certain this wasn’t me, unless I’ve taken to sleep walking…which for Girl Scout cookies is not an improbable possibility.



Me: “My darling daughter, can you come here please?” {Totally how I said it, I swear}


Drama Queen: “Yes mother?” {Again}


Me: “I found this empty cookie box and a mess; ALL the Girl Scout Cookies are gone. Did you do this? Tell the truth. {Like reminding them makes a difference}


DQ: “Nope wasn’t me.” {Blink, blink, batting incredibly cute blue eyes}


It is important to note the boy was at school when said crime took place.


The line up looks a little something like this: Drama Queen, Sparkleworks, and Pinky Pie the ponies.


It’s not going to take a CSI unit to uncover this one my friends!


Me: “Well, if I didn’t do it, and you didn’t do it…who did?”


DQ: “Mom! I know who it was! Leprechauns!”


AHA! Teaching moment….or so I thought. Just last week the drama queen and I had a conversation about Leprechauns and how they ARE real; she saw the footprints from the Leprechaun traps they set in Kindergarten. "Yes sure honey, they are real."  The only viable proof I could’ve then provided to dismiss the Leprechaun allegations would’ve been what? Yup, that Leprechauns are NOT real. Then who’s the liar?


Luck of the Irish!

She’s going to make a great lawyer someday.

Spring Break...We're Getting Crazy



Drama Queen and the Boy

 Well spring is upon us. Oh wait, it's snowing. Dandy. Such is life in the upper Midwest. Drama Queen is on Spring Break this week, unfortunately, the boy has his in two weeks. Oy. In some alternate universe we might go somewhere, escape, but that isn't happening anytime soon. The boy and I can hardly make it to the grocery store without some mini-meltdown, so planes, trains and automobiles to paradise will just have to wait. I'm adventurous, but not an idiot.



So, in lieu of sandy beaches, we will just have to make our own fun. In my usual multi-tasking manner, I decided to devise a plan and do some light spring cleaning {not gonna get crazy here}. First order of business to vacuum behind...underneath...around the couch. As you may already know, this can be a scary undertaking, never know what you might find!


Well friends, I am excited to report a little miracle, which, was much less sticky than expected! Who knew cleaning could yield HOURS, no joke, of entertainment for the chicklets. As I moved the couch out from the wall, squeals of delight ensued. A virtual treasure trove of lost and forgotten junk toys was discovered. You know the usual, hot wheels, squinkies, Barbie shoe, Hungry Hippos marbles, puzzle pieces, etc. It was like Christmas, literally....it's snowing. God only knows what will happen when things thaw out and I can clean out the car!


And let me tell you, we don't stop there, oh no, things are about to get even crazier. I know! The kids are begging me to watch Baby Einstein in Spanish. You see we're all about education here at the Bubble Gum household {cough}.


Feliz primavera! {Happy Spring, I think}

Here We Go...Again

IEP Day.  Cringe.  I would rather have a pap smear.
Okay it was IEP day in the house! Yes, I know, I know you're on the edge of your seats. As often is the case, my IEP posts tend to be rants of rage and WTF moments as I delve into the mediocrity that is our school district {note, when I refer to mediocrity, that includes, lack of funding, time, resources, and sometimes education that leaves their hands tied, not for the wonderful professionals who work with my son}.


For anyone not versed in the world of special needs, IEP, or Individualized Education Plan, is mandatory for children who receive special education services in the public schools and it must be updated once a year. So after 8-9 scheduling options are thrown out because everyone and your grandma must be present, a date is finally set. This is a good thing. The teachers, paras, occupational therapists, speech therapists, mental health professionals and the special needs coordinator must be present.

As you may remember, or not, the coordinator and I are not on greatest of terms. A brief reminder, I had pulled the boy out of the district and moved, only to find the transition to be too much for him, so we decided to come back. Children with Autism tend to have over the top issues with transition of any kind, and this is one of my little guy’s biggest hurdles. So after consulting with his whole team, I decide this was the best move. UNTIL I accidentally receive an email from said coordinator {not meant for me, oops don't reply to all} basically saying things like, "oh great", "why is she coming back", "more paperwork". Look lady, paperwork is my life's story, and what is best for my son WILL be my first priority. Don't mess with mama bear! I did reply, and took the high road, and perhaps may have played the single mom card a wee bit. She did not attend our last IEP meeting, which was good for both of us I'm sure. She was there this year, and notably unprepared, wasting sooo much precious time asking me questions about little guys private school and other outside therapies that everyone else in the group already knew about. Do your homework lady, read up. When it came time to discuss future plans, like 2 years in the future plans {in Autism world there are years of waiting lists, one must be prepared} I presented my "best" plan. The team was impressed, except for coordinator, who questioned me on several things relentlessly. I won't go into detail, but I was right, she was wrong, and she made a complete ass of herself. Again, wasting precious time!  The team followed up by telling me what a great mom I was for the 10th time, can't hear that too many times in a day, and we carried on.

Told you....rant. Back to the IEP at hand. We have made a lot of progress. Firstly, Gabe's IEP actually referred to him as Gabe and not "Jonathan" 3 times like last year. I was livid to say the least. I also finally got little guy moved from his one on one classroom once a week, to a room with 6 children {and a fantastic new teacher} twice a week. He also receives OT and Speech twice a week there as well. This on top of the private school where he attends Autism Day Treatment five times a week, and has made nothing short of remarkable progress. In fact, at our last progress conference at the private school, they told me they may not be able to have little guy attend next year because they won't be able to keep him qualified. Bittersweet, as is most progress news in the Autism world. Qualifications. Great that he is doing so well, but still needs those services to keep advancing. It's almost all or nothing, boo.


So, I didn't have to fight for Gabe quite as hard this round, the team by now knows I mean business, and obviously my son is a rock star, so my plan is working. And he is working so hard, I'm so proud of my little guy!  I made sure to include his diet restrictions and nixed the gluten laden playdoh and glue to be replaced with a GFCF version. We will continue to work on transition, social skills, calm body choices, and articulation. So it wasn't so bad.


I still feel very blessed to have such great professionals working with my son. What they give of themselves is nothing less than amazing. I also realize that these "early" IEP meetings are cake compared to those in my future, having read other horror stories. As the child grows older, and services are much, much leaner, and class sizes are larger, it can sometimes or often times be difficult to enforce the IEP. Parents with special needs kids have to be the advocate for the child, you cannot wait for things to happen, you have to make it happen.

Training: An Update

Thought I'd give you all an update on how training was going for my 5K in just a few weeks.  My routine is brutal to say the least, looks as follows....

*Yoga- 4xs a week
*Running- 3-4xs a week
*Girl Scout Cookies- daily, hourly at peaks moments of the day

Darn cookies!  I'm not trying to lose weight, not that I would mind.  I'm pretty happy with my self.  I KNOW, perhaps the only woman in America with a healthy body image.  BUT...I'm not trying to gain any weight either! 

Curse you Girl Scout crack cookies!  Who can eat just one?  Who?  No will power where these cookies are concerned.  Maybe there is a support group for this {phoof, blows crumbs out of keyboard}.

Told Myself So...



As you may have read earlier on, I told myself so.  Drama Queen as shown above with her splendid new {and splendidly expensive} American Girl.  Not just any ol' girl mind you, the girl of the year no less...Kanani....from Hawaii.  Considering we live in frozen tundra 8 months out of the year, I suppose I can see the attraction there.  Drama Queen begged for an American Girl last year for her birthday and Christmas, but I thought she was too young.  So since she still insisted this year, I caved.  I spent the $100 dollars with visions of the best 6th birthday ever, unforgettable memories, inseparable the two; doll and girl, maybe even a tear.  When I was her age until probably 5th grade I was very into my dolls.  I took them everywhere, I cared for them daily, we played together everyday.  Little Miss has baby dolls, but I would say she plays with them here and there, way more into the stuffed animals and Squinkies {go figure, they are 50 for 10 bucks, should have bought a cart load of those}.  But it is a different time, I am a proponent of imagination, but let's be real kids these days are bombarded with media and forced to grow up too fast, too early.  They are exposed to much more than I was as a child, and have more to deal with, more adult issues.  "G" rated movies are injected with adult humor as is a great majority of "kid friendly" shows on television, then there are video games, movies, etc.  I'm getting way off topic here.

 

Her Dad and I surprised her after school by taking her to the American Girl Bistro and giving her the doll she has begged for....for....ahem...and to quote, "30 years".  She was truly surprised and excited.  Although in the back of my mind....The bistro was incredibly cute, darling little desserts and a lil' tea cup just for your American Girl.  I suppose you pay for the experience as much as for the product.  All in all, a fantastic 6th birthday.  We then arrive home, unload the gifts and gear and settle in.  What's this?  Kanani face down in the snow boots?  Without some deep breaths, I would've been next on the television show "Snapped".  Not to mention we had to buy the special hairbrush {since Kanani has the longest hair of any girl made to date}, great, she chose the Rapunzel of American Girls.  And I WILL be obsessive about brushing it so it will maintain some beauty for awhile. The wonderful staff, and they were, I'm not being sarcastic {this time} sure had this little 6 year old sold on the doll ear piercing and hair salon for our next visit.  Endless.  So, poor Kanani comes out when there is a tea party at hand, otherwise, I can count on one hand how many times she's been played with. 

I asked Drama Queen this,  "why don't you play with your American girl honey?"

"I just don't know Mommy, but I love her."

Guess I can't get mad at that.  Told myself so, but it was still worth it...and hopefully she'll grow into it.

Celebrity....Not So Much





Of the 10 posts I am contemplating in my head, this is what I feel inspired to write about. Ridiculous I know. Two posts in one month about celebrities, arrggg. Thus, this post is inspired by the incomparable, Bret Michaels. Yes, musician, reality star...um other adjectives come to mind, but I won't pollute my blog, he's basically a ho. Really, anyway, still can't believe I'm writing about this. At any rate, the other night, at an impromptu girl's night out, as we were walking, we passed Bret Michaels. Of course I did not see him with my own eyes as I was chattering away with one of the girls, but he was indeed spotted by the other gals of the group. When they mentioned it, we contemplated  getting his autograph. But the consensus...no, we proceeded to our destination. And his arm candy was giving us the snake eye, must have been our radiating beauty, or lack of cleavage. Really I see celebrities just like anyone else but they just have a lot more complications in their lives, not that I feel sorry for them, I just don't get the whole autograph thing. Once you have it, what do you do with it? I met Michael Jackson when I was 11 years old by chance at Disney World. I was completely star struck. I was a huge fan, had all his tapes, posters and for a brief period of time wanted to marry him. I got a picture, but no autograph. I touched Garth Brooks from the front row at his farewell concert. Woo. Met some guy I can't even remember the name of from the Apprentice in the security line at the airport. Anyway. Don't see the big deal.

This got me to thinking. My life is truly 6 degrees of separation. Celebrity aside, I'm more excited about how I seem to draw all these amazing people into my life and we are all bizarre-ly connected in some way. That just fascinates me. And it's not a onetime thing, it is a consistent occurrence. I won't go into all the stories, so many incredible ones. But a few scenarios would be posting a random picture of me with a friend at an event, and then a random friend seemingly unconnected seeing the picture on facebook and referring to that person as her angel. Great story. Or in high school the girl I sat next to in health occupation class was best friends with my old neighbor when we lived in another state. I'm just in awe by that. And it is just ingrained in me now that each person comes into your life for a reason, good, bad or ugly. Each person has a purpose or role to assist in your growth or purpose in this life. I truly believe that God/the Universe places those people in our path for a reason. I don't think Bret had such a  purpose however other than to spark this post, and provide good conversation over drinks.

I'm curious to know, have you had any "celebrity" meetings?  Did you get an autograph?


Photo courtesy of http://thecelebritycafe.com/feature/dad-bret-michaels-doing-better-04-24-2010

Cuz I'm Crazy Like That....

I hereby declare on BOMS, that "crazy" will now be referred to as "brave". So here's why, I know you're just at the edge of your seat. {I know, I'm pretty sassy lately} I am running a 5K eight short weeks from now. Am I a runner you ask? Nope. Do I enjoy running? Nope. Am I being paid for this? More than likely no, actually paying to do this. Am I doing this to lose weight? No, but a nice perk.

So, as I was registering for the run, to make myself accountable, I thought to myself..."I am crazy". But really there is nothing crazy about it. Running and I have always been arch enemies, I enjoy exercise, but running or the mere thought, makes me cringe. I just don't enjoy it. So much so that it caused me to get an incomplete in my college running course, basket weaving and yoga were full. So the final in the course was to run a 5K. I opted to sleep in that morning. Three years ago, I challenged myself to run the Race For the Cure 5K; I ended up walking it with the other 12,000 people.

So this is a fear and procrastination that I have to face. I can't grow without facing my fears head on...taking the bull by the horns....now or never...always regret it....well you get the point. This is part of my new year's resolution after all.

It's really astounding what a little, "I think I can, I think I can, I knew I could", can do for the soul. Anything is possible even getting my lazy butt out of bed and going for a run, IN THE SNOW. Believe me I am going to post pictures and gloat for a good 6 months after I do this.

So, I am putting it out to the universe. Holding myself accountable. And being brave. After all it’s facing all those little fears that teach us the tools to overcome the big ones.

*Update*
As you may have read in the commentary I was running on Mother's Day, I change of plans {thank God}.  I am running mid May in the Autism 5K, woohoo, and other glorious plans came up for Mother's Day, which I will blog about in due time.  Thank goodness this gives me more training time and I may not come in last place, only second to last.

Moron

Charlie Sheen....you are a moron.  I will not post anything else because too much media attention is already being given to this loser when there are more pressing world issues at present. 

I just want to give a shout out to all the people who have lost their job or paychecks who work(ed) your TV show because you are a raving lunatic. 

That's all I have to say about that.

Moron.

Don't Waste My Pretty

Stop the presses...sticky situation ahead, and averted. I read a fantastic saying the other day that I had to share, "I'm not going to waste my pretty on you". Today I put that into action. The last several months I have been dating, one gentleman in particular. And let me say, a nice night out, having a great meal (sans chicken nuggets or fish sticks), fantastic (uninterrupted) conversation, and being the center of attention can do wonders for the self-esteem. As nerve racking as it was to get back out there, I was brave, maybe even fearless...and did it.


And then today I had a revelation. I'm kinda wasting my pretty on this guy, so to speak. He is charming, and smart, and very handsome. We have so much in common and laugh and really enjoy each other's company. However, no spark. You can't will a spark. I just had to get real with my now "officially in my mid-thirties" self, and say, what am I waiting for? Also he has no children, and isn't sure he wants any of his own, but....he loves kids.  What does that mean exactly?  Don't think I'll stick around to find out, and from our conversations he's just scared.  But it's not my purpose in life to bring him over to the other side where parenting is a privilege and the best thing I've ever done or will do for that matter.


Being older and wiser I know I can't change people, and wouldn't change anything about him, I almost feel like we're so much better off as friends. My younger self would’ve probably kept on going wondering if something might materialize; but I'm no spring chicken! I mean I'm not at death's door or anything, but I have to wield what I have to work with here...and that's limited! Naturally my shiny personality is always top of the list, and that I won't lose, but gravity and metabolism are working against me at a frantic pace! It also doesn't help that I've pushed out two 8 pound watermelons with arms and legs and therefore my "temple" shall henceforth be named, "the ruins". (Sidebar...Worth it, worth it, worth it, and sorry for the graphics)


The Pursuit of Happyness was on television the other night, which I tried not to watch in its entirety because I turn into a big bawl bag [bawl bag-n. cry baby, courtesy of The Notebook, which is also on some channel every night of the week]. Okay back on task, I love when the main character in the Pursuit has named different chapters of his life, i.e. being stupid or happiness. So this chapter of my life is called, JOY. I am so at peace, with myself, with my children, with my direction. It feels good.  Sometimes it's scary to close a door because we might feel lost or empty; but in my experience there is always a new opportunity presenting itself around the corner.  As long as I remain open to that, my life will remain joyful.   I can manage my life and feel happy and grounded.

 I'm proud of myself for getting back out there. I had a lot of fun the last couple of months, and got back in touch with my pretty.

Stick It Influenza

Boy have I been off the map.  When the New Year's Resolution is the last post and it's March, whoa.  Missed you blog, missed you friends.  Once again Blue Cross Blue Shield Almighty and I have gone to blows.  Grrrr.  An entire month of developmental preschool now paid out of my pocket, with little to no chance of reimbursement.  That put more than an extraordinary ding in the ol' pocket book, which has a way of leaking anyhow.  I don't even want to start with the tax situation and how they hold you hostage until you say uncle.  Deep breaths....and release.  For now anyway.

So last week, well two weeks ago, drama queen turned 6!!!!  When I find the darn camera cord, I'll post pictures of her perfectly pink American Girl Day.  And of her American Girl that she begged for and has played with once.  I told myself so.  That, my friends will get a post of its own I assure you.  The day after queenie's birthday she had a high fever, and all the other symptoms that go along with flu (not the stomach flu, thank God).  And this week, the boy followed suit.  As I sat in the pediatricians office bracing myself for the riot act for not getting my children the flu vaccine (we didn't last year, and were fine) I started second guessing myself.  Maybe I should've just done it.  What!!!  Huh....?  I hate when fear creeps in and I doubt my choices, good choices for my family.  I know Gabe cannot handle all the junk in that vaccine, and then to only chance at most a 50% return on NOT getting that strain, sorry not worth it in my book.  {Self-doubting Mom interrupted}  The doc came in and asked if I got the kids vaccinated and this was his response and I quote, "probably just as well, it's not working well this year anyway with all the new strains out, we've seen record number of kids having been vaccinated this year contract influenza, and I had it last week."  Oh kind sir, Amen and high five.  This may not seem like a big deal to any of you momma's with typical kids, but for kids of special needs fighting against brainwashed, "nothing we can do for Autism" doctors, this is a small victory.  Wait, big victory in my little world!  It, just for a moment seemed as if I were garnering a bit of respect from this doc, instead of the evil eye.  But to all you evil eyers out there, it was only 20 years ago, they were institutionalizing kids with Autism, blaming it on bad mothering; and now my son will be mainstreaming into Kindergarten.  Hah.

So stick it influenza!